“Be who you are. Don’t let other people change you.” -Grisella
” He is so good to me- I should respond by being nice too!”
“Damn, how can she be so rude- I will give her a taste of her own medecine and act similarly to her!!!”
Now, does this sound strikingly familiar? Do you behave likewise? If yes, then, people influence your behaviour and dictate your emotions to a great degree. You are not in your own control. You act according to people. Anyone has the ability to annoy or disappoint you because you gave away that power of yours!!!
Image Credit: Huffington Post
Changing your attitude and nature towards people just because they do not reciprocate reveal the great extent to which you suffer from instability in your life and are void of inner peace. When you permit people to direct your behaviour, then you, in some way or other become their puppet. Simply because, you will eject a reactive response to whatever they say or do.
People act according to their nature! So, why do YOU change your nature depending on theirs. Be what you really are with everyone, irrespective of how they are! This does not only bestow onto you bliss but also make you feel content with yourself.
This story below depicts it all;
Once in a monastery two monks walked about doing their morning duties. As they passed a small bowl, filled with rain, they saw a scorpion was drowning in the water. One monk reached in to save the creature. As soon as his fingers touched the panicking Scorpion, it stung him and the monk dropped the Scorpion back into the water. The monk sighed, and reached back in. This time he got his grip a little firmer, but still dropped the Scorpion when he was stung. He kept reaching in, as his friend looked on in confusion. After dozens of attempts, the other monk spoke up saying “Brother, why do you keep trying to save that scorpion? It stings you every time you come near it. The monk paused before reaching in again and smiled. As another sting bit into his hand, he took a fallen leaf from the ground and pulled the scorpion out to safety. He finally said: “Because it is his nature to sting, and my nature to save. Don’t forget brother, soon either I’ll stop feeling the pain of the sting and he will be saved, or he will stop being afraid and be saved. Compassion cannot be stopped so easily.”
Internalise the fact that you can change and control no one apart from yourself. Before trying to change people without their consent, be ready live a life fraught with frustration, disappointment and anger!
Don’t let yourself be highly affected by others’ nature when you know you cannot change them? Instead you end up causing yourself misery! Be in your own skin whilst let them be in theirs!
Yes, be compassionate and helpful towards a ‘drowning’ person but just as the monk pulled the scorpion from the water by resorting to a fallen leaf, use your wisdom and know your own limits before you handle every situation.