Verbal taunts, criticisms, rude comments or even shoulder ‘bumps’ are provocations that at a point or another hammer our hot buttons., sometimes they are pushed hard enough to evoke us to explode. These buttons differ from person to person but are inherently ‘installed’ in each one of us.
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Now the underlying question which persist is : how do we wisely deal with these provocations and make an objective attempt to disarm our hot buttons?!
To emerge out successfully from this ‘anger cycle,’ you can either have recourse to either understanding or compassion.
Every provocations are reactions based on your personal emotions and experiences. They are in fact underlying issues screaming loud to be unbottled. Thus, when any kind of situation threatening yoir beliefs or challenging your ‘insecurities,’ you succumb to yoir hot buttons and resort to anger as a defense mechanism! For instance, if since childhood, your hard work has never been acknowledged- maybe it now flares you up if someone fails to accredit your efforts!!!
This becomes a never ending war unless you seek the refuge of understanding and this is HOW you do it:
● Be detached. Pull yourself from that infuriating situation and watch the whole scenario as if a fly on the wall witnessing the situation. Watch your mind without any bias. Try to understand what is dictating your behaviour and ask yourself some pertinent questions as: “why am I so easily triggered by this person’s behaviour? Why is it about him that make me lose all my sanity? Am I insecure? How do I neutralise this?” From hereon, you make it to the ‘divine path’ of growth and utter awareness since you now grant yourself the tools to identify and work on your trigger points. This does not only set you free as a peaceful being but also puts you on a healthy trail of learning. Learning how to be better each growing day.
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Coming to compassion, not everyone possess a great mind to be able to accede to this powerful instrument since it requires one to be fiercely mindful.
● Train your mind into knowing that provocations are mighty traps. Once you fall prey to them, there begins a saga of needless sufferings- Anger!! Frustrations!! Disappointments!! Moodiness!!
If ever you are inflamed, take a deep breath. Indulge in some healthy self talks such as: This is a vicious whirlpool. I cannot sacrifice my saneness and imprison myself. Why should I emulate his anger and jump into this raging fire? When he/she calms down, I might reassess this matter and try help him to overcome his weak points.
Be compassionate to yourself and others. Be wise enough to decipher when and where to wield which tool for the greater good.
Provocations, if get victimized by, one gets trapped in a limitless loop of negativity and pain. Learning what triggers your hot buttons make it easier for you to cool down, look for effective ways to counteract them and hence breathe a life of harmony.